At the men’s retreat last weekend, I recommended five of my favorite books on sexuality and marriage. Since only one of these is written exclusively for men, and not all of our men were able to attend the retreat, I wanted to push out these resources out to all of you. Feel free to use the comments section below to ask questions about any of them.

The Purity Principal – Alcorn’s book is a short read and gets to the point quickly. Purity is always smart. Impurity is always stupid. If you need to a sobering reminder of the life & death nature of the fight for God-glorifying sexuality, this book is for you.  

Sex is Not the Problem (lust is) – This book stands out for two reasons. First, it’s filled with honest, humble examples from the author’s personal experience. Second, it helps you see how to fight the temptation to lust with the promises of Scripture. Harris refuses to speak in Christian platitudes and ends the book with a guide for creating a personal strategy for pursuing purity. And no, he doesn’t use that many p-words in one sentence.

Sacred Marriage – I’ve been a big fan of Gary Thomas ever since he spoke at one of our marriage retreats a few years ago. This book is about marriage more than it’s about sex. But the chapter on sexuality in marriage provides a solid overview of how to think about purpose of physical intimacy between a husband and his wife. If you’re married and don’t have a history of healthy conversation about sex, try reading Gary’s chapter and discussing what you learned. Note: That’s altogether different from reading Gary’s chapter and discussing what you hope the OTHER person learned.

Sex, Romance, and the Glory of God – Here’s one designed primarily for husbands. I still remember my favorite quote. “Touch her mind before you touch her body.” There’s a wealth of wisdom for married men in those words. You can read this one in less time than it takes to watch a football game.

Sexual Sanity for Men/Sexual Sanity for Women – Both of these resources, one for men and one for women, are designed with a small group in mind. All the men who signed up to continue the conversation we started at the men’s retreat will be working through White’s book over the next 3-months. Sexual sin thrives when we’re isolated from community. Sexual Sanity for Men and Women helps make the fight for purity the group-project it needs to be.

All of these resources are available in our Book Shoppe on Sunday mornings.

Matthew grew up attending KingsWay and joined the pastoral staff in 2009. God has blessed him and his wife, Aliza, with three rambunctious boys. Matthew did his undergraduate work at the University of Richmond in chemistry and political science, spent a year at the Sovereign Grace Pastor’s College, and received his Masters of Divinity from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary.


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